Hi, it’s me again – you do not remember me? I am Olly and I live in the tree overlooking your flat and, normally very uninteresting (apart from the very occasional worm), patch of grass.
Yesterday was a mild exception, there was a lot of flurrying about first thing in the morning. My old friend Russell was doing his usual walking up and down the grass with a very noisy machine. Then someone with a white hat appeared and fussed about (what is the point of all the flags?) until he was joined by two other, white clothed, gents. That resulted in a tent structure being installed – but then they all went into the clubhouse (I heard someone say “Anyone for coffee?”).
They seemed to be waiting for something and, sure enough, some more people arrived. I counted seven people on the grass and noticed the white hatted bloke was talking animatedly on the phone, was one person missing?
Things then started to happen with various, I think they are called ‘players’ by the cognoscenti, waving long hammers around to knock coloured balls through white hoops. It all looked a bit chaotic. Finally, there was another clash from the gate (did I mention before about the noise of that gate - it keeps me awake, something really should be done) and an eighth player appeared. This triggered some organization and pairs of players started playing what I recognise as an elaborate competitive tribal dance with long hammers and balls.
Around midday that gate noise woke me up again and a fair maiden appeared carrying food – sadly not for me. This brought the players into the ‘tent’ where they stayed for what seemed to me like a very unnecessary length of time. There were open sandwiches, crisps, strawberries and cream and not a morsel left for me. There seemed to be rejoicing over mobile phone news of a baby being born.
After all that merriment, the tribal dance continued, although I did detect a spring in the home players’ steps from which I deduced that, so far, they were ahead in the tribal dance competition.
The afternoon got hotter, though the flies (sadly not to my taste) which had irritated during the morning had flown. By this stage I was sleepy again, so it was only the sound of more merriment in the ‘tent’ that woke me (is it too much to ask for some consideration?!) to see no dancing happening and everyone eating again. If it was an important competition, then the home team seemed to have won as they were making the most noise.
I did overhear (I have very keen hearing as well a sight) someone giving a brief summary (Ed: HWCC players first): “Ian and Andrew drew (1-1); Ron beat Roy (2-0); Michael beat Pam (2-0); Alan beat Stuart (2-0); Ian beat Roy (2-1); Ron lost to Andrew (1-2); Michael lost to Stuart (0-2), and Alan beat Pam (2-1). Result: HWCC 5 and half, Ryde 2 and a half.” whatever that meant!
In closing, could I just please remind you that I sleep during the day, so I really do not like being woken by the noise of your gate – please be considerate of your neighbours!
Yours – a grumpy and aggrieved Owl,