Jabbercrocky

‘Twas brillig, and the Toovey Clips
Did jingle-jangle in the breeze;
All mimsy were the borogroves
And the bisques climbed the trees.
 
“Beware the Jabberhoop, my son:
The jaws that catch, the wires of steel.
Beware the Rover Bird, and shun
The frumious Triple Peel.”
 
He took his mallet bold in hand
Long time the perfect stroke he tried; 
Then rested he by the WC
And checked the Rulings Guide.
 
And as in baffled thought he stood,
The Jabberhoop with jaws so tight
Emerged from out the distant mist
And cried, “Come on! Let’s fight!”
 
One-two! One-two! Each mighty blow!
The double taps came thick and fast -- 
Alas, no referee -- and so
He ran the hoop at last.
 
“And hast thou run the Jabberhoop?
The victor’s oil thy head anoints!
You gain -- oh joy! Oh, whoopy-whoop! -- 
Three hundred index points!”
 
‘Twas brillig, and the Toovey Clips
Still jingle-jangled in the breeze;
Still mimsy were the borogroves
Like the bisques up the trees.
 
Chris Webbley, with many apologies to Lewis Carroll